I know a lot of boys who have been adopted from Russia, and they are all very good kids. I have also witnessed so many boys doing really bad things on this trip. It makes me wonder, at what age do good little boys become bad boys? (not looking for an answer…just one of those general quandaries I have)
The other day we visited Anya. As we were pulling up to the orphanage, I noticed a boy outside that is in her group. He is probably 8. He is a trouble maker, and the caregiver is ALWAYS yelling at him for something. Generally the interaction I’ve seen between him and adults is him doing something, the caregiver turning around sharply – saying something stern and the boy laughing and running away.
So, I saw this boy outside the orphanage in the courtyard. He was with 2 other boys that were a bit older. The bigger boys gave him a cigarette and he lit it up like a pro.
Later that same visit, Steve was sitting in his car waiting for us and he heard a thud on his car. Some of the boys were throwing rocks at his car from a second story window. He went inside to tell the guard / receptionist. Don’t know what came of that.
Maybe it is just this group of boys in Anya’s orphanage. But I can’t get over how every day we are there; we witness something bad a boy is doing.
I think if you bottom line it all, it comes down to role models. It is safe to say that these boys have had no male role models their whole lives. Caregivers are primarily women. Maybe this is an example of what happens to fatherless boys? What do you think?
2 comments:
Kathy, two of our boys are adopted. The first always had an issue with pathological lying. At age 14 we legally returned him to his biological mom after he attempted to steal a gun and kill us. I don't know if you have heard of Cec McGregor, she is a lawyer/judge in Goshen who adopted a sibling and also had problems. This child got into jail soon after and remains there all these years later.
Our second son is FAS. We knew from the get go that things would be rough and they have been. He is a young adult and we do still have a relationship with him although he struggles to make choices.
Sometimes I feel like a failure.
Role models and Jesus! Our Nikolas would have been right there. I know it if it had not been for Jesus! He was only 1 when he came home from Irkutsk but wow he did really naughty things until a few years back when we had him prayed over!
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