touching adoption story

I want to share an adoption story. This is the story of a friend of ours (who will remain anonymous). This person has been a great support to us, and has prayed with us throughout this entire process. Today, he is an amazing man of God – someone anyone would be humbled to call ‘friend’. Below is a recap of an email conversation we have had over the past few days.

Dear Marty and Kathy,
My heart has been very moved by your love for this girl. I think you both know that I was adopted when I was five. My brother and I slept in a cardboard box in Chicago. In the winter we rode the streetcar back and forth across the city all night to keep warm. The family who adopted me also had some struggles; and my "blood parents" later tried to kidnap me. My adopted family sold their business and home in Illinois, and left all of their relatives and friends and secretly moved to Indiana, just to make sure that I'd be safe. What a sacrifice they made for little 'ole me.

So I know what "ADOPTION" means! I will continue to pray for Anya and all of your efforts to reach this precious life.

Irkutsk - the walking street

Many of you have probably heard me talk about the walking street - this is a road in downtown Irktusk. It's where there are a lot of shops - and my fav restaurant. Here is a video of the street - what you will see is VERY typical. For those of you who have been there - the big mall is behind the camera. The camera is pointed toward Karl Marx street (I think). My restaurant, Fiesta, is the bigger red building to the right (I think...)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z3PzpDfBGoM&mode=related&search=

document update

We got word on our documents today. We were able to gain some assistance from the law school at the University in Irkutsk. They have provided the Russian version of the Hague - highlighting the section that says, "an apostille can not be rejected".

Our lawyer had a meeting with the Judge regarding our case. The judge confirmed that our lawyer will have no trouble submitting our file again with the corrections, clarifications and so on.

YAY!

So now, we are back into prayer-warrior mode. We need for all of the documnets to come across the Judge's desk - and be flawless. We are still praying for a miracle, and want Anya home by Christmas! OK, I know I've said that every year for the past 3 years...but I'm going to keep saying that until I don't have to anymore!!

Russian adoption video

If you've ever wondered about Russia, adoption, what the orphanages are like there...I encourage you to view this video

http://www.thepromise.org.uk/video.htm

There is another vide on this site as well, here:
http://www.thepromise.org.uk/originalvideo.htm

so sad!!

Press On

I talked to a friend tonight who is going through some stuff. As I was talking with her on the phone, I was trying so hard to come up with the right words to comfort her. Nothing was coming to my mind. I wanted to tell her that God would never give her more than she could handle...that she knows the Truth...that the worst is behind her...that I loved her, and would do whatever I could to help her through this.

And no words came to me.

Tonight when I got home, I wrote her a note. The song 'Press On' was ringing in my head so loud - I felt like I needed to turn down the stereo! So, I sent her the lyrics to this song. The words are something I've clung to so many times.

Press On (3:56)
(Dan Burgess)

When the valley is deep
When the mountain is steep
When the body is weary
When we stumble and fall

When the choices are hard
When we're battered and scarred
When we've spent our resources
When we've given our all

Chorus:
In Jesus' name, we press on
In Jesus' name, we press on
Dear Lord, with the prize
Clear before our eyes
We find the strength to press on

In Jesus' name, we press on
In Jesus' name, we press on
Dear Lord, with the prize
Clear before our eyes
We find the strength to press on
To press on

©1983 Belwin-Mills Publishing, Inc. (ASCAP) All rights admin. by Warner Bros. Publications, Inc. (ASCAP) All Rights Reserved. Used By Permission.

10 things that make you smile

My friend Brenda "tagged" me on her blog tonight. She posted 10 things that makes her smile, and asked 3 people to post what makes them smile.

What a perfect thing to have me think about today! I've had a particularly crappy (is that politically correct?) day. Ever had one of those days when everyone you have to deal with gets on your last nerve? Ugh!

OK, focus on good things…

1. Knowing there is a God, the He loves me no matter what! (even when I have days like today)

2. My husband…he’s a good one! God has truly blessed me with a good man!

3. Our little Anya…only God could have perfected a union like the one we have with that little one! It still amazes me how much she looks like us and acts like us…and I didn’t birth her – and she is still living in the orphanage! Her laugh, her smile, the way she mimicks everything I do. Pretty much everything about her makes me smile.

4. Good friends – who will listen to you gripe and feel your pain, and love you anyway (and then probably pray for you!). Ya know, those pals who you can call or email from Russia when you're in a panic, and they will answer the phone or email? ...unless then went to bed early? (ha ha, had to get that one in there Kath!)

5. I love the worship band at church, I love the worship music my hubby has made…but ya know, Bon Jovi REALLY makes me smile :) (or maybe it's just John BonJovi?)

6. Great shoes – ok, seriously – I love shoes. I think it is a sickness. Better than therapy, healthier than mood-altering drugs or food. ...so I guess my awesome job should make me smile too - so I can buy great shoes! (seriously, I do love my job!)

7. Fall – I love this time of the year – when the air is cool, and the sun is warm (but not as warm as it was today…93 the end of September is nutty!)

8. Relaxing in the pool with my hubby – the only time we’re not working it seems…our cheap little above ground pool is the best investment we’ve ever made!

9. Laughing and being silly…I don’t take myself too seriously, so I love being around other people who don’t either. LIfe is too short to be constantly wondering what other people's motives are, and wondering if they think you're an idiot.

10. The amazing things that God is doing – things I don’t even know about and can’t see…I guess the ‘end of the story’. That makes me smile with tears in my eyes.

Now, I would like to hear from you!! What makes you smile?

documents...wouldn't ya know it

Well, I shipped off a stack of documnets to Russia on Friday. I was witing for a form we needed to get from our social worker. I waited a day before I got tired of waiting, and sent to documents. Wouldn't ya know it...about the second the DHL guy pulled out of the driveway, the FedEx guy pulled in - with what I had been waiting for.

Oh well - what is a little more money lost in overnight fees?

...off to sell more pants and tops :)

What do I do?

I ran into someone the other day who asked me “so, with all this waiting to adopt Anya, what do you do every day?” Seriously - someone said that to me.

My initial instinct was to say that I’ve been spending my time getting massages and pedicures…but as I started to speak, I bit my tongue. Asking me a question like that really means that she doesn’t know me well. What did she think I was going to say? That I sit in Anya’s room and cry away my days? That I sit at my computer and blog about all the ridiculous things people say to me?

Ugh!

letter from the Chief of the Immigrant Visa Unit at the United States Embassy in Moscow

We got this note today from some new guy with the Embassy in Moscow. To date, no government agency has done squat to help us - so I am more than a little skeptical about this guy.

Below is his note to me - and my reply...happy reading!
________________________________________
From: Moscow Consular, Russian Adoptions
Sent: Thursday, September 20, 2007 8:02 AM
To: kathy@mmprod.com
Subject: FW: Request for information - Irkutsk adoptions

Greetings,

This July I took over as the Chief of the Immigrant Visa Unit at the United States Embassy in Moscow, and I am writing to update you on the Embassy's ongoing efforts to resolve the continuing problems with international adoptions in the Irkutsk region. A few days ago the Ambassador raised this issue in a meeting with Russia's Ombudsman for Human Rights, former Russian Ambassador to the United States Vladimir Lukin. At Ambassador Lukin’s invitation, we intend to follow up with his office to review cases pending in the Irkutsk region to assess how best they might be resolved.

This past summer, the Embassy sent out a request for information to families who have been trying unsuccessfully to adopt in the Irkutsk region, and the information we obtained from those who chose to respond to this request will be extremely helpful as we engage with the Office of the Human Rights Ombudsman. If you have not responded to our earlier request for details about your case, and if you wish the Embassy to raise your case with the Office of the Human Rights Ombudsman, I would invite you to respond to the questions below with any information you may have to offer. Please respond as soon as possible if you wish us to raise your specific case. Details regarding any specific problems or objections given by the court for not accepting your dossier or not providing you with a hearing date would be especially useful.

If have new information to report, we would appreciate updates. If you do not wish us to raise your case in our ongoing dialogues with Russian authorities, please let me know that as well.

I want to assure you that we will continue to raise the problem of American adoptions in the Irkutsk region (and elsewhere) with the appropriate Russian authorities, as we advocate for a fair, transparent legal and regulatory framework for international adoptions in Russia.
Sincerely,

Mark Seibel
Chief, Immigrant Visa Unit
Embassy of the United States
Moscow

Questions:
1) Name of adoption agency (in US and in Russia, if different)
2) Name of Russian adoption agency representative and contact information
3) Yes / No, Was your adoption agency accredited at the time you submitted your application to the court in Irkutsk?
4) Date you submitted your application to the Irkutsk court
5) Docket or case number given to you by the court (or confirmation the application was filed)
6) Explanation the court gave you as to why your case would not be considered
7) If the court had any procedural complaints, were these addressed?
Please feel free to add any further details which may be relevant to identifying the reason that your case was halted by the court. If the court provided any written refusal to you, please provide the substance of that refusal, or even better, a scanned copy of the document.
_________________


Hello Mr. Seibel,

Let me start this note by saying that I think, after 3 years, I have become an expert on adoptions from Irkutsk, and am an expert on being a pre-adoptive-parent.

I am sure prior to you taking over this position, you were given background on the situation in Irkutsk. Allow me to share my experiences with your agency / office.

I have provided information to your office SEVERAL times in the past. I have filled out your forms, and answered your questions. I have spoke on the phone with people in your office. Nothing has ever happened. 2 years ago, we received a letter from the State Department saying that (basically) they are sorry for our frustration, however are choosing not to do anything to help.

We were told (over a year ago) that the Embassy was “looking into the matter”. Looking into a matter and taking bold action are very different things. Bold action is what is required in Irkutsk. Interested onlookers are not helpful; on the contrary, they are bothersome. Unless there is a solid plan to deal directly with the authorities in Irkutsk (the Chief Judge and Governor’s office), and force the courts to adhere to their own law, I politely suggest you remove this project from your desk.

It is cruel and unfair to continue to give American families false hope by saying that you are looking into a matter. As one of the families who have been waiting the longest, and one of the families who were to get a court date the summer Nina Hilt was murdered (2005) – I am tired of empty promises. I am tired of inaction, and I am tired government bureaucracy. The only thing I am interested in is real, solid, swift action to bring my daughter home.

The problem with the ‘plan’ your office has in place is that most American families have not submitted documents to the Judge in Irkutsk. There are very few (2 or 3) American families who have presented their documents to the courts in Irkutsk over the past 2 years. Our dossier was presented in 2006, and again 10 days ago.

I have been diligent about making contacts in Moscow and Irkutsk to keep our adoption moving forward. We just returned from a trip to Irkutsk. We were granted a meeting with the Chief Judge in Irkutsk regarding our case (very unusual for an American family). The Chief Judge accepted our documents, and passed them along to Judge Stepanova (the Judge who is ‘in charge’ of adoption cases). Judge Stepanova issued a legal statement regarding our documents, detailing changes. This is the same thing that happened when we presented our documents a year ago.

The changes the Judge has asked for include some things that do not represent the law (in Russia, or in the United States). Examples include:

1. The way the documents are apostilled. The apostille on all of our 125 documents adheres to every standard and guideline specified by the Hague. The Judge doesn’t like the way it is done. She cites that other countries use a ribbon (for example) to tie all of the documents together. She also cites that the border (box) around the information on the piece of paper that is the apostille isn’t a perfect square (I think the dimensions are 10cm x 10.12cm – something insignificant). Our lawyer in Irkutsk is going to fight this, however, the ultimate ruling is up to Judge Stepanova.

2. She also cited in the legal statement a Russian law that deals with adoption agencies that work in Russia. This law deals with the way the office is to be set up within the Russian Federation. Bottom line – this has nothing to do with us, our case, or our documents. I am not sure why this is even a part of our legal statement. Of course, our lawyer is going to fight this, and ask the Judge to completely remove it from the statement.

3. The statement also make mention that we are independent. It does not say that she will refuse our case because of this, it is just a comment made in the legal statement. I should also preface this by saying that the Judge continues to hear many French cases – all have been successful in court. All are independent.

4. In the past, the Judge in Irkutsk has accepted documents, with the condition that the family obtains a medical exam prior to court. The medical exam (by 8 doctors) needs to be done at a state clinic. The ONLY clinic that is a state institution, that houses each of the specialists is in Moscow. Judge Stepanova is requiring this medical exam before she accepts documents. The medical exam is only valid for 60 days (might be 90) – and the Judge will not offer a court date within that time, so the document expires. When the document expires, the Judge will refuse the documents because of an expired medical exam. This is what has happened to us. Essentially, what this means is thousands upon thousands of money spent unnecessarily by American families. It is a never ending battle that could go on forever.

I am interested specifically in what your office will be doing, other than gathering the same information that has been provided to you time and time again. Quite honestly sir, I am so fed up with the lack of support and help by my own government I could scream. To this point, everything has been a lot of talk, and no action. I refuse to allow our little girl to be a political pawn. I will not stand by and 'wait' for you to gather more information. I won't sit back and be patient and wait to see what happens. I do not trust that anyone or any agency will do anything to help us get a court date in Irkutsk, and bring our little girl home.

It will be interesting to see what you DO.

Sincerely,
Kathy Friend

SO FRUSTRATING!

For a long time, I really thought that God's plan in this adoption (partly) was to teach me patience. Then I thought maybe it was perseverance. Then maybe it was tenacity. Now, I think maybe the lesson is to not lose my mind under extreme pressure!

The changes to our documents was minimal. This is good. I got everything done - and have been waiting to for the document from our social worker. With that, I can send things to the State to be apostilled - then everything can be shipped off to Irkutsk.

Well, I was supposed to get that document from the social worker yesterday, and I still don't have it. It was Fed Ex'ed, and I can't seem to find information on it to trace it.

UGH!

Anya and education

I've been thinking a lot about how much Anya has changed in the past 3 years. Gone are the days when she had chubby cheeks, and barely spoke a word.

Education in the orphanage is a little different than what we would consider education. Anya is very smart. She is quite an artist, can recite poetry, knows several dances. She has no problem singing songs in front of her group.

There is a lot of emphasis on the arts as opposed to science. She can count to 10, but then needs help. She can't write her name, and can't read. But - she loves to 'read'. She loves looking through books, and being read to. This shows me that she is hungry to learn.

When we were there a year ago - she couldn't count to 10. I think maybe we were the first ones to really count to 10 with her. She could count to 3, but then got confused (and it was like 1-2-3-5-6-4-8-7).

Anya also has some natural athletic ability. I've never seen the kids being schooled in the finer points of athletics at the orphanages...but who knows. That little girl can throw a ball, and catch it like you wouldn't believe.

Anya is very concerned about her appearance. One day, we got to the orphanage a little early - and she was outside playing with her group. She saw us, and RAN inside to "look pretty for mama and papa". It bothers me a little, that somehow she has learned that she has to look nice for us...which of course she doesn't. But, when a new 'mama and papa' come to the orphanage, there is talk among the caregivers about how they have to 'make the children look beautiful'. The kids do put on nicer clothes, bows and ribbons in the girl's hair and so on.

Kids are kids, I guess. And they pick up things, and learn things you wouldn't think they were paying attention to.

If other moms and dads are on this board, and can chime in on this Russian institutionalized education thing, I would love to hear what your experiences were.

piggy-backing on previous post..

To take the previous post (news story called 'Does She Cry in Korean?"...I found this website http://www.adoptlink.com/language.htm. I feel compelled with the strength of pre-adoptive-parents, AND post-adoption-parents everywhere to share this enlightening information.

It is funny the things people say to you when you are part of an adopted-family. Things people would never say to someone who was pregnant - or who had birthed a child. The good-intentioned comments can be naive, and quite honestly, cold-hearted.

In the 3 years we've been on this journey, we've had some amazing things said to us. Most aren't mean-spirited, many made me take a step back and say "huh"? Here are some examples:

"When are you going to look in the mirror and admit that this adoption might not happen"?

"Why in the world would you want to start another family again at YOUR age?"

"Are you SURE you want to do this?"

"It seems you are just throwing away good money after bad"

and my favorite:

"Why would you want to go to Irkutsk, don't you know that the devil lives and breathes there?" ...that one was too much. Anyone that knows anything about being a Christian knows that anywhere the devil is - so is Christ. So, yes, that is EXACTLY where I want to be!!!! And, to take that a step further - If the devil was 'living and breathing' there...why would I want to leave my daughter there?

Something that is said to us all the time, is "so-and-so adopted from Russia, and it only took them less than a year. You should call them". I completely understand the logic and helpful spirit that is behind this kind of comment. And, for a long time - I hunted down and talked to TONS of these families. I quickly found that was a complete waste of time.

This is why. Each region in Russia operates independently. Basically, it's like each region (state) is a different country. Unless the family who has adopted did so in Irkutsk - there is nothing that they can say, and no information they can provide, that will be helpful to us. Unless (of course) they know someone in power in Russia, who might be connected to either the Chief Judge in Irkutsk or the Governor in Irkutsk.

Adoption isn't for everyone. Likewise, birthing a child isn't for everyone! I know there are tons of people out there who don't understand why we're still fighting, and I know that there are even those out there who don't support our fight. So be it. To the naysayers - I say this...UNTIL YOU'VE WALKED A MILE IN MY 3" STILETTOS, KEEP YOUR COMMENTS AND ATTITUDE TO YOURSELF.

on being an adoptive parent

I found this article on another blog. Although it is old - I love it.

'Does she cry in Korean?' Parents get questions when raising adopted kids Bill Dawson
August 10, 2005 ADOVARONLINE0810


Adoptive parents of foreign-born kids get these questions all the time:
“Is she your real daughter?”

“How will you teach him English?”

“How much did she cost?”

Kris Huson of Children’s Home Society and Family Services in St. Paul calls these “the grocery store questions.” Though usually well-intended, they can make an adoptive parent cringe.

Or laugh. “Does she cry in Korean?” is one of the bizarre questions asked of Kim Brown, adoptive mother of a 2-year-old daughter.

“I always thought babies cried in a universal language,” says Brown, who lives in Crow’s Landing, Calif.

My wife, Ila, and I, who adopted a baby girl named Sonali from India, are constantly amused at what people say.

Ila, who is of Indian descent, had a co-worker tell her, “It’s so amazing you were able to get such a beautiful child from such a poor country.”

Hmm.

Mary Sjoberg of Apple Valley got a similar jolt after she decided to adopt a child from Calcutta. Her aunt asked, “Oh, are you going to India to adopt because they’re so smart in math?”

Kristin Vonnegut’s mother asked, “Are you going to become Buddhist?” after Vonnegut decided to adopt from India.

“Which is funny,” says Vonnegut of Avon, Minn.,“because most Indians aren’t Buddhist.” Vonnegut’s father-in-law wondered why she wasn’t adopting from Mexico, where “they’re so much more docile.”

Speak to me

Ila and I also have discovered that curiosity around language abounds when you adopt a child, even a non-speaking infant.

“Is she learning English?” is a popular question. Sjoberg, a teacher, was surprised to hear this from a colleague.

“My school is half ELL [English Language Learners], so, excuse me?” says Sjoberg. She adopted Kiran, now 4, when the child was 8 months old.

Kristi Jenkins of Marion, Ill., will soon be united with a 20-month-old boy from Mumbai, formerly Bombay. She’s also mom to two stepchildren and one biological child. Her stock answer for those who wonder how she’ll be able to communicate with her newest child?

“I tell them, we didn’t understand our biological daughter when she spoke to us in English at 20 months,” Jenkins says.

Harsher words

Not all comments are so amusing.

Before her baby joined her, Sjoberg was asked if her little girl would be “dots or feathers.” Sjoberg was baffled until the questioner explained that dots meant dots on the forehead —India-born —and feathers meant feathers in the hair — American Indian.

She’s also heard, “Thank God she’s here and growing up a Christian,” and, from an elderly man in Hoyt Lakes, Minn.: “If you rub her skin, will that make her lighter?”

Others stand out:

“Does that dot on his forehead scratch off?”

“I couldn’t bring a person like that into my home.”

“Aren’t you afraid people will think he’s Middle Eastern?”

The last came from a co-worker who said, “People will think he’s a terrorist,” prompting Jenkins to ask, “How can a 20-month-old be a terrorist?”

Jenkins blames some of this on where she lives in Illinois. “I think I’m kind of in redneck land here, and I think there still is a lot of racism.”

But similar comments are heard in Minnesota, which has the nation’s highest rate of foreign adoptions per capita.

Ask Becky Steeber, who works at Children’s Home Society and is an adoptive mother of three. A physician tending to one of Steeber’s adopted boys, who has spina bifida, asked, “Do they [the adoption agency] have any healthy white kids?”

“One of most appalling comments I ever got,” Steeber says.

What’s worse, Sjoberg said, is that often, “they’ll ask these questions right in front of the child. It really amazes me how people can be so … unsmart. I really want to say stupid.”

Brown sees this as a growing challenge now that her daughter is getting old enough to understand what is being said about her.

“I have to think how Natalie is going to think about these questions,” says Brown. “I don’t want her saying, ‘Are you my real mother?’ ‘Do you love me as much as your other kids?’\u2009”

Cautious questions

So what is the right thing to ask? First, know that adoptive parents aren’t hypersensitive souls who parse every statement, looking for something offensive. We love talking about our kids. And we understand that most people aren’t trying to be insensitive; they just don’t know how, or sometimes what, to ask.

Still, when addressing an adoptive parent, you might want to rethink the following questions:

“How much did he cost?”

What you probably mean is, “How much did the adoption process cost?” That varies, with much of the cost going to administrative fees. “It’s not just paying someone off and taking a child across the world,” Brown says. Some parents find this an intrusive question, others are happy to answer, but none of us likes to think of our kids as having price tags on their foreheads.

“What happened to her real mom?”

We know you mean “birth” or “biological” mom, but it’s still a sore semantic subject. Adoptive parents are real parents and some can get really touchy about this. Try to use the b-words, birth or biological, and we’ll try to understand when you forget.

“Why did you adopt overseas when there are so many children here?”

Multiple reasons. One is the domestic adoption laws that give U.S. birth mothers time to change their mind and reclaim the child. Bonding with a child, and then losing him or her to the birth mother, is heartbreaking, especially for couples who adopt because of infertility. This seldom happens with foreign adoptions.

“Why was he put up for adoption?”

A fair question, but don’t be offended if we decline to answer. Many parents consider the details private, and want the child, when he or she is old enough to understand, to know this information before others do.

“Do you get to go to an orphanage and pick one out?”

No, it’s not like choosing a puppy at a kennel. Usually, the prospective parents submit a preference for a boy or girl, a range of ages, and whether they’d be willing to take on a “special needs” child, which is usually a youngster with a disability or health concern. The agency or service eventually sends them the picture and profile of a possible “match,” which parents can accept or refuse. If they refuse, they’ll get another match, until they finally find the right child for them.

“Isn’t she lucky, being raised by loving parents in the U.S.?”

Sure, but it works both ways. Adoptive parents feel immensely lucky and blessed themselves. Even non-religious couples often feel that Providence has stepped in and given them the perfect child.



For more information: http://www.childrenshomeadopt.org

Bill Dawson is at wdawson@startribune.com.

What is Russia like?

I've run into a lot of friends who are asking me what Russia is like - aside from my editorial comments. I thought the best way to tell that story is with some photos.


This is a photo of the Novatel in Moscow. Probably one of the nicest in the city.





This is a photo of a typical neighborhood. Most people live in apartments - but the neighborhoods are surrounded by ancient homes like these. Most don't have running water or electricity...which is completely unimaginable considering this is in Siberia!

Anya's English Lesson

Anya Fun Video

Anya Good Bye Movie

I love this video - it was taken on our last day in Irkutsk (last Saturday). In the beginning, you will hear Anya say "ya tibya loobloo" That is 'I love you' in Russian.

Also, when she is on the phone, she says "hello - how are you" and 'paka' is good-bye.

Just a little helpful translation!

Good Things About Russia

I feel like I have been doing a lot of Russia-bashing recently. I kind of feel bad about that - because there are things about Irkutsk I really like. So, in the interest of 'fair reporting', I thought I would post a list of those things I do like and miss about Irkutsk:

1. Anya (duh)

2. the water - I don't know what it is about the water, but it does wonders for your skin and hair

3. Anya (double duh)

4. Walking. We figured that we walked about 5-6 miles a day - which is why on day 1, my feet hurt so bad! But thanks to the Adidas store in downtown Irkutsk, from that point on - I had happy feet!

5. OK, the Adidas store!

6. Since we're on shopping (something that I consider myself an expert at)...boots and shoes. Irkutsk has the greatest shoes - and there are more shoe stores there than anyone could ever visit during one trip. I will say that the 2 boots I got on this trip are some of my favorite (leather, hand crafted for about $35 each!)

7. Another shopping note - fur. This is the place to get a fur. I figure the last time I go there, I will splurge and get a fur...maybe a mink? Or red fox?

8. Anya

9. Simplicity. Everything seems so simple there. Our lives are so busy, and filled with junk. THere isn't time or space for junk when we are in Irkutsk. Everything is very simple. And, we get by nicely (without all of our electronics, gadgets and comforts of home).

10. The people watching. Not only the beautiful Russian women, but in general.

11. Anya (gotta throw that one in again)

12. Bread and Cheese - since that is about the only thing I eat there - I will say they have great bread and cheese.

13. Speaking of food...Fiesta (the restaurant on the walking street that is kind of like a Russian version of Panera) and the new buffet on the corner of Karl Marx and the walking street (best potatoe pancakes I've ever had!)

14. The friends and people we've met in Irktusk and Moscow. Everyone that we're working with (and have worked with) are genuinely great people. Although they don't always appreciate our American sence of humor - we love them all for all they've done for us.

15. Finally...Anya. I miss her laugh, her smile, her inquisitiveness, her mimicking everything I say and do, her hugs, the sparkle in her eyes. I miss her asking me every day if I got her some sunglasses to wear.

I think once we get Anya home, we will still remember Irkutsk with fond memories...traveling there is another story - but being there is always nice. When we were in Moscow - someone said something to me that was interesting. He said, "In Russia, it is very hard to get here, and very hard to leave. It does not make sence, even to me - one who is Russian".

...and I think that is a great way to end this post!

Fun Statistics

For those of you out there who know me well - you know that I dig stats (which is probably why I was a good media buyer - back in the day!). I have a statistics function as part of this blog, and I thought I would share some of the info:

Since mid-August, we've had 576 (as of now) visitors to the site

The visitors have come from 3 countries: USA, France, Germany. This is a little skewed since I logged on when we were in Germany (so that was me). I do have some other Irkutsk-adopted-parent friends in France - so that makes sence.

Most people log on between 7-9am, with another spike at 6pm.

Most people come here from a bookmark in Internet Explorer or Firefox. But, several people have come here through classreport.com. My high school class has a site there, and I posted a link to this site on my profile. For those Riley-ites who have visited - Hello! And thanks for stopping by! ...and Lisa B. - if it is you (I guess it isn't Lisa B anymore!) - I can't find your email address, and I need to get in touch with you! Email me! I'm coming to Ohio next week.

Thank you to all who have followed our trip - we will continue to update the blog with our progress, and any new info.

Surprise!

I just love this photo of Anya. She was sitting on my lap, and I was showing her some toy or something. Too cute!

Anya in glasses

Yes, ANya is still wearing glasses. WHen we got there - we were told her glasses were broken a long time ago...and amazingly while we were there, she got new glasses. I still am not convinced that she needs them.

GOD IS GOOD – ALL THE TIME

When things happen, like what has happened to us with our travels over the past dew days, I always start thinking to myself - what is God trying to do with this situation. What am I going to learn? Marty keeps telling me that he thinks at the end of all this, I am going to be one to help families who are adopting with paperwork and nightmares. I can’t truly help unless I have experienced everything there is to experience. Well – as nice as that is, from where I sit right now, I don’t think so!

As we are sitting on our direct flight from Frankfort to Cincinnati – I just noticed what was on the TV in the airplane…Friday Night Lights. And, what got my attention was someone saying ‘South Bend’, and the football players on the show talking about going to Notre Dame.

What truly matters in any story is how it ends. We’re not quite done with the end of our adoption story, but we are turning the page on this chapter. This chapter is going to end with us home…coming into the C Concourse in South Bend! (and right now, after 2 days with very little sleep - that thought is about to make me cry!)

Trip from H-E-Double-Hockey-Sticks

I don’t think I can put into words, the feeling at the end of a trip – when you reach that point when you are just ready to be home – when you find out that you might not be able to go home (and it’s not your fault, or in your control). I am still reeling over the experience in Moscow yesterday. I swear I don’t understand why no one with any airline would help me. Here is a reiteration of one of my favorite interactions with one of the members of the Aeroflot team:

Me: “hello, please, can you help me”
Aeroflot: “what is your problem”
Me: “I am interested in purchasing a ticket to London”
Aeroflot: “it is very expensive”
Me: “Can you please tell me how much?”
Aeroflot: “Neit!”
Me: “What about Paris, are there seats available on your flight to Paris tonight?”
Aeroflot: “Yes”
Me: “how much for 2 tickets on that flight?”
Aeroflot: “it is not available”

After that enlightening conversation, I decided to call home and get some help on that end. If we could get a hold of someone who could call Sandy, she might be able to help us. I wasn’t thinking that it was Sunday morning (about 11am) at home. In order to use the phones in the Moscow airport – you have to purchase a ‘smart card’. We got 2 smart cards – good for about 6 minutes on the phone. There are about 10 pay phones. 9 of them don’t work. I found the 1 that worked, and started to try to get a hold of ANYONE at home that could help. I started with my Mom (home – no answer. Cell – no answer). On to my brother – he ALWAYS has his cell with him, and always answers it. No answer. Then – I tried to call my friend Kathy – she always answers too. No answer. The on to Melissa – Sandy is her step-mom, so I thought she would know how to get in touch with Sandy. No answer.

After a few attitude adjusting deep breaths, I started to try to call everyone on the list again – from the top down. Where in the world was everyone in my life???? This time, Mel answered the phone – but for some reason, she couldn’t hear me. ARE YOU KIDDING???

After slamming the phone back onto the wall, and noticing that all of the guards and police-types were looking at me, I thought I better take a walk and cool off. A guy came up to me, and was asking me about the phone. I wasn’t in the mood to ‘chat’. Come to find out, there was some trick to using the phone – a trick that wasn’t written in English on the phone. Apparently, when the party answers the phone, you are supposed to hit a button to activate the ability for them to hear you. So – back to the phones I went to call Melissa again. THANK GOD! She answered. I got the phone numbers for Sandy.

I slight feeling of relief came over me…I picked up the phone, and tried to call. No answer.

At this point, I think Marty was getting scared of me. I could feel that I was about at the point of losing it. You know that feeling where you really just want to cry – but you can’t? So you are using all of your energy to fight back the tears?

I walk back up to the Aeroflot counter, the ONLY one with an agent (imagine that!). Again, this woman would not help me. I don’t know if she didn’t understand English or what. I was done – totally and completely done.

Marty and our driver, Max (yes, poor Max was with us, trying his best to help) went to the counter. I told Marty I didn’t care where we went, but we needed to get out of the country – and we only had a few hours to do that.

We ended up in Munich. Of all the places we could have ended up – it was perfect. Just what we both needed. That is a beautiful airport. The people are so pleasant, very helpful, very willing to handle whatever your problem might be. A great example is when we got off the plane, and went up to the information desk. We were trying to find a hotel. Rather than simply telling us where the hotel was, the person at the desk called the hotel, got the rate, reserved the room and gave us a kind-of confirmation. By the time we got to the front desk (about a 5 minute walk), our room was ready for us – with an upgrade to a suite! Although we were only going to be in the hotel for a few hours, it was so nice! Internet access to contact our family (and Sandy) to help us figure out how to get out of Munich, a huge bed, great shower, room service with food that was some of the best we’ve had in a LONG time!

From Munich – we headed to Frankfort – and had the same outstanding experience with everyone we dealt with. If you ever have the chance to fly Luftansa, go to Munich or Frankfort – do it! And of course, call Sandy at A World of Travel to help you. She has been our lifeline over the past few days. I seriously do not know what we would have done – or even where we would have started to find a flight home. Sandy was able to give us EXCELLENT advice, and more importantly, tell us what we needed to do to get home.

The Mosquito Diaries

I hope the roving gang of mosquitoes that made a meal out of me are happy. I do tend to exaggerate, but this time, I promise that I am not stretching the truth. I have roughly 25 bites. I do not understand how I can have all these bug bites, and Marty has none! The other odd thing is that I didn’t feel any of them! At home, you can generally feel a mosquito attack…in Russia, they’re like ‘no-see-ums’.

…and of course, since we left Russia, I have not had any kind of bug bite me!!!

Getting out of Russia

Well, we have had one HECK of a time trying to get out of Russia. Our flight was delayed by 8 hours, causing us to miss our connecting flight home. With the help of Sandy from A World of Travel (and everyone should use her for travel needs!!), we booked a flight from Moscow - Rome - Paris. Well.....those darn Ruskies, we missed that flight too. And wouldn't ya know it, NO ONE in the Moscow airport could help us. We spent roughly 2 hours going from desk to desk, asking for help. We tried to get a ticket to Paris - and were told 'no'. No one would help us. The ONLY place someone would allow us to buy a ticket to was Munich - so that is where we are - Germany...

Why not overnight in Moscow? Well, our Visa was only valid through Sept. 9 - so we had to get out of the country by midnight. If we were there any longer, we would not be allowed to leave - and according to the Embassy, it would take at least 5 days (up to 20) to get the right documentation to get us home. UGH! Not allowing us any leeway on our travel dates is another "thanks Russia" thing. Our Visa came directly from the Russian consulate in Houston. They required that we only have a visa for the exact dates of travel.

I don't even want to think about how much time, money and frustration this is causing us. We've been awake for about 27 hours. I've not eaten (Aeroflot doesn't serve food I can eat...nice!)...so we're a little DONE with this traveling thing.

We're heading to Frankfort tomorrow a.m., then catching a flight home. We will post again once we get home.

Praying for safe, efficient and hassle free travels!

-Kathy and Marty

Anya

Anya was asking a lot today if she could go with us. She asked Julia (our interpreter) several times when she was going to go with us. We still don’t think she completely understands the whole concept of being adopted – but she does know that she is going to go home with us – although she thinks ‘home’ is like where she is now. I think I had a worse time leaving today than Anya did. As we were leaving, she asked if we were coming tomorrow…we said no, but we would come back one day. She kind of sighed and said that she would be waiting, and would miss us. My heart broke. Every single one of her caregivers has asked us when we are taking her home. I know they have no idea what is going on with the court and the Judge.

In Anya’s daily English lessons, we taught her to say I love you. Today she was putting together ‘I love you mommy’ and ‘I love you daddy’.

We’ll have more photos and video to post next week when we get home. We leave Irkutsk tomorrow morning at 8am.

THE THING ABOUT RUSSIA

There are a few things about Russia that I can not understand. I’ve been here 4 times, each visit, I stay at least 7 days…and I still can not figure out why texi drivers and clerks at stores (specifically at grocery stores) get peeved when you don’t have the exact change. It makes no sense!

I also don’t understand the driving here. It is like one of those crazy video games – in real life. It is unusual to be here for any length of time and not see a fatal accident. Which brings me to another oddity of Russia. When there is a bad accident – no one seems too excited about it. We saw one (again) today, there looked to be a dead guy in one of the cars…and no one was really doing anything. A few people standing around and a police officer measuring something on the road. Odd.

Wearing the same outfit for days on end. Maybe it is because of what I do for a living, but I don’t get it. Apparently, Russians wash out their clothes at night, and wear the same thing the next day.

Beer…everywhere beer. Not vodka – beer. Beer in the hands of everyone on the streets; kids, grandmothers, amputees, men, well dressed women. Everyone!

The inequality of good looking people. As I mentioned in another post – there are a lot of beautiful women here. Even those girls who are ‘ok’ have striking features. Men – not so much. I think I’ve only seen maybe 3-4 good looking men.

Fish for breakfast. I know that this is a ‘thing’ at home too (I watch Martha Stewart – and yes, I know she has salmon every morning). But common – yuck! A little fish with your corn flakes!?

Why are there SO MANY ½ built buildings all over the place…but a ton of new construction going on?

And I really do not understand how I got SO MANY mosquito bites all over my arms and hands! UGH!

I do understand feeding children tea, pushing and shoving instead of orderly lines (to get on an airplane, pay for something, walk through a door…), and how ridiculously hot it is in the mall. The bottom line? There’s no place like home!

IRKUTSK

For any of you who have been to Irkutsk – you will appreciate how much it has changed. When we first came here (3 years ago), very few places took credit cards, and the only familiar place was Benetton. Now, there is what appears to be a Domino’s Pizza, Burger King, and most places take credit cards.

There is construction all over the place - lots of new buildings and places to go. It's like a new city!

Anya's mama and papa

Anya has gone past calling us mama and papa. Now, we’re officially mommy and pappy. More specifically – HER mommy and pappy. Anya goes back and forth to who is her favorite. Today – I was her favorite. Everything I did – she did. It was so cute! She asked me to get her 2 lipsticks, because I had 2 lipsticks (her lipstick is Pooh chap stick). She wants sunglasses because mama has sun glasses. She wants earrings, because I have them (we have those play stick on earrings…yesterday she had 4 on each ear!). She likes her red shoes because Mama has red shoes. She has taken to mimicking everything that I do…I stand and put my hand on my hip – and so does she. Whatever I say – she repeats. Needless to say, I probably need to be careful about the words I choose!

Little Stinker

We are back at the apartment for lunch after our time with Anya this morning. When we got there, she was being taken into the doctor's office for some kind of finger-prick. She was not happy about that!

After she calmed down from that - she was in a mood! I don't know what they fed her for breakfast, but it really wound her up! I seem to remember during our last trip - toward the end of our stay, she started testing her boundaries and so on. One good thing is when she starts acting up (throwing toys, climbing on furniture etc.), we tell her no - and she does stop. It's easy to redirect her attention to something more productive.

We brought some string and beads with us today so Anya could make necklaces for all of the kids in her group. There are 10 children - 3 girls and 7 boys. All of the children loved their new bead necklaces! It will be interesting to see how many of them survive lunch.


more later!

Document update

Before we head to the Detski Dom today, I thought I would post a quick update on our paperwork.

The statement from the Judge was interesting. The main problems she has with our documents is our Indiana State apostille. I did work with the State Department to have them change it, however, apparently it is not a PERFECT square (something that you could only find if you measured it with a ruler...by eyeballing it, it looks like a square). She is also saying that the way the apostille is attached to the document isn't legit. Whatever that means.

We will need to find the Russian version of the Hague detailing the 2003 (I think) update/revisions. We just need to show her that the things she is asking for are not the law.

Other changes are minor. Nothing we can't take care of swiftly. We have until September 25th to comply. Our lawyer said that typically, families do not comply with every change detailed in the Judge's first statement. Some of the things the Judge asked for in the statement, she was provided - which means that our lawyer needs to go back to her to show that we did provide that. Once the lawyer and Judge agree - the legal statement is revised, deleting that point.

This morning I will need to get a hold of our friends in Moscow to help us redo some medical forms, and to redo a letter from the Embassy. The Embassy provided us with a standard letter that is used throughout Russia...but of course, this letter isn't good enough for the Judge.

Like I said, the changes are minor - and a matter of "majoring in minors". The most concerning thing I can see is the apostille. Gathering all 125 documents last time for our dossier about sent me over the edge. I can't imagine having to do that again. I will...but the thought of it makes me want to curl up in a corner and hide.

Please pray that we can quickly find the information on the Hague in Russian. I have a weblinnk - however it is in English. If anyone out there has a link - please forward it to me!

Thursday

I tell ya, the more time that we spend with Anya, the more in love with her I seem to be. There is something to seeing our little girl’s face in the morning light us as we walk into her room. And the look of disappointment at the end of the day when we tell her that it is time for us to go.

I know leaving this time is going to be very hard.

Anya didn’t want to play outside today. We can’t figure out why – other than to notice a change in her personality when we go outside. There are always lots of other kids playing, and Anya clings to us. Maybe showing that we’re hers? One thing I noticed is that when we pay any other child any kind of attention (even to say hello), Anya instantly wants to be picked up. We stayed in for the morning, but were told that she must go outside in the afternoon. She was even taken to the doctor’s office, so the doctor could tell her that it is good for her health to go outside.

We’ve been playing a lot of catch with her. She loves that game. These are some photos of us playing outside this afternoon:










And yes, she has worn the same pants since we gave them to her on Sunday. I bring her new outfits every day, but she insists on wearing those jeans (that are falling off of her booty).

Anya loves to pretend play. We have had several tea parties, we ate a dinner of cabbage, soup and meat at her restaurant (the cost was 5), and we watched her play house with some dolls. She is so imaginative, and so good at imitation. We’ve been working with her every day on English. She likes to show off to the other kids in her group using English words. We will try to put up a video of her speaking some English.

Photos from Wednesday

More Photos...

more miracles

We just found out that the Judge will have a statement ready regarding our documents tomorrow afternoon. This is crazy! Legally, she has 5 business days, and we are getting a statement within (basically) 48 hours! Our lawyer and interpreter are dumbfounded. Everyone is scratching their heads, with smiles on their faces. We were also told that no other American family has been able to get this far in the system in 2 years. No one knows what to expect.

Of course, we don't know what this statement will say, but we are continuing to pray that Judge sees everything that she requires in the documents, and doesn't see the things that cause her to reject documents.

It's all too much...we are simply amazed at what God does when a situation is covered in prayer.

...more when we know more!

Anya Singing

IT WAS A MIRACLE

The plan was to meet with the Chief Judge on Tuesday, to ask her to tell Judge Stepanova (and I know I spelled that name wrong) to accept our documents. We had a meeting scheduled yesterday with the Chief Judge, and today with Judge Stepanova.

The miracle started when Judge S. accepted an appointment from us. She only accepts adoption cases and/or appointments every 2 weeks, and this is not a week she was accepting appointments.

Yesterday, we went to the Chief Judge’s office, and within a 2 minute meeting, our documents had been officially submitted to the courts, Judge Stepanova’s assistant got the documents, and the Chief Judge told Judge S. to expedite the review of our documents. The Chief Judge also made sure we knew that all cases are reviewed the same, regardless of nationality. The Chief Judge also said that in the future, if we need to submit changes to our documents, we can do it through her office, and they will be accepted.

When we walked out of the Chief Judge’s office, our lawyer and interpreter both turned to us with looks of awe on their faces. When we got outside, they both said, “that was a miracle”. They did not expect the Chief Judge to accept our documents.

The Judge now has 5 days to review our documents, and give us a written legal response. The response will be those things in our documents that need to be changed, or additional requirements she might have. We will then have 2 ½ weeks to resubmit any changes she has.

Our lawyer will check with Judge Stepanova’s office tomorrow to see if she has reviewed our documents yet. Because the Chief Judge asked her to expedite the review, our lawyer doesn’t think she will take the full 5 days.

We are continuing to pray for miracles. We are praying that Judge Stepanova reviews our documents, and finds no changes or additions. Now THAT would be a mracle!

Anya Kiss

Julia (our translator), Anya and me...

Photos from Monday

Here are some photos from our visits with Anya on Monday!

The beautiful girls of Irkutsk

There is a myth that Russian women are not attractive. For most Americans, when we think of Russian women, we think of the typical babushka. Let me tell you, this is NOT so.

It is remarkable how really beautiful the women are in Irkutsk. I noticed this before on other trips to Siberia, but never as much as this trip. Think of the most beautiful super models, the leggy blondes with perfect skin, hair and form. Those women are typical here!

It’s almost a joke between Marty and I. Absolutely drop dead gorgeous women all around…and I seem to be the one to make sure he take note...Too funny! We are going to try to take some photos – discretely - to post here. If you are a single guy, you might want to consider learning Russian, and vacationing in Irkutsk!

post from Marty...

Today we connected and bonded to Anya in a way that, up to this point, we have not. The other times we were here Anya was a bit stand-offish. When it was time to say goodbye, she was more than happy to go back to her room with her peers (the only "family" she has ever known). This morning, we took her out to the playground where she usually drags us around with much enthusiasm. This time was different. We pushed her on the swing for a few minutes but she lost interest quickly. At a time when she normally wears us out with the energy typical of a 5 year-old, she wanted to be held. She latched on to Kathy's neck with a death grip. She was completely silent as she hung on. It was as if she was a dead battery being charged for the first time. After a long period of time, I asked her if I could hold her. She nodded "yes" and continued the same silent death grip that she had on Kathy. Somehow she plugged into something that transcended the normal child-like desire to play. She sensed, maybe for the first time in her life, a pure source for something she needs more than air. She needs us. She is bonding to us in the way God designed every parent and child to bond.

The director of the baby home told us that Anya is a leader in her group of children. She is a deep thinker, and a compliant child. She is all of these things against all odds. Anya has never known family. She has never been held more than a few minutes by care-givers who cannot possibly satisfy the emotional needs of so many children. Technically, she does not know (nor could she put into words) what she is missing. But the need is still very much there. It's just under the surface waiting for the connection we are so eager and able to give.

We are in the middle of the greatest struggle of her life. The outcome will totally determine her future. We are so thankful that we have the network of committed prayer warriors standing in the gap for us! We can feel the momentum and influence of your partnership with us. We need you all to pull out the "big guns" with us right now as we meet with the people in positions of authority which have the power to govern her future. Please join with us as we petition God to influence them through whatever vehicle he chooses. Pharaoh and Nebuchadnezzar were influenced by dreams. Balaam was influenced by a donkey. God knows EXACTLY what will get their attention.

We all know that the last 5% of any worthwhile endeavor is the hardest. We are definitely at that point and we need you now, more than ever, to help hold our arms up. Thank you all so much! We love you all!

Monday September 3, 2007

Monday September 3, 2007

One phrase can sum up today, ugly cry. For those who don’t know what that is, let me offer an explanation. The ugly cry is when you’ve been shoving emotion for a long time, and it finally comes out. It’s when you start crying, and can’t stop. When the tears take your breath away and boo-hooing replaces breath. I know I am an ugly crier, without going into the ugly cry. Maybe that is one reason I don’t like to cry. My nose gets all red, I get these splotches all over my neck and chest, my eyes get really red. That that, and multiply it by 100….that was me in the taxi on the ride from the Detski Dom this morning.

We went to the Children’s Home (Detski Dom) this morning for a visit with Anya. When we got to the home, we had a brief meeting with the director, Helen. She is a wonderful woman who loves the kids. She has been our ally in this process. After the compulsory update on Anya’s development, education and health, we were able to see her in a play. The play was more a program. The adults dressed up as characters, and were teaching the kids different lessons. We have no idea what was being said. Anya noticed us right when we walked in, and a big grin came across her face.

After the play, she came running up to us and jumped in my arms. Anya then took us to her room, so we could be with the caregivers and her group for a while. As the children were having a snack, we enjoyed some tea and chocolate with the caregivers. Of course, Anya was sitting with us, not the other children. Anya introduced us to her group, and made sure to point our which children were wearing her clothes!

We went outside. It is a beautiful day here in Irkutsk. Cool breeze, warm sun. We played on the swing for a while, and then went over to the slide. I picked up Anya off of the slide, and that was the end of the story…for all of us.

She grabbed a hold of me so tight, even if I let go – she would have still been molded to my body. We walked around for a while, and then Papa took over. Anya didn’t want to play, she didn’t want to walk, and she just wanted to be held. It’s funny how a child instinctively knows mama and papa. That innate need a child has to receive affection from parents, the deep need children have for closeness and love. All of that poured out of our little Anya this morning. And, that is ok with us!

One of the caregivers came up to us and said something to the effect that it was time to go inside for lunch. I think our translator told her that we would be going, and come back after lunch. Anya started crying – big, huge elephant tears. She couldn’t put into words why she was crying.

We went back inside, and Marty set her down. The caregivers said something to her – and Anya looked at me. I picked her up again to get her changed into her inside clothes. She was still crying. I can’t tell you how heartbreaking it is to me to have my little girl crying, and know that she doesn’t know why she is crying. It hurts my heart to know how much she needs us. The Detski Dom is a good place, and meets her basic needs very well. But they can not fill the void in her heart that only a mama and papa can. I think Anya knows this, and feels it.

The director told us that she asks all the time when we are coming back. Anya sees other children who have been adopted by a mama and papa. She understands what all that means. She sees other children who get a new mama and papa – and within weeks, they are having a party for the child, and the child goes home with mama and papa. Anya has asked when we will come back for her.

I’ve never felt more like Anya’s mama than I did today. We are more committed than ever to move heaven and earth to bring her home.

We are waiting for a call from a taxi that will take us to a meeting with our lawyer. We’ve received several calls this morning with various questions about our documents and so on. We know that our ‘team’ has been working on preparing our case all day. I’m not a control freak (ok, not much of one)…but I have some ideas on approach of my own. It will be interesting to see what our lawyer says.

AFTERNOON UPDATE
After our meeting with the lawyer and the lawyer at the adoption center - we trucked back to the Detski Dom. Traffic was horrible! We stayed with Anya through dinner. She was in much better spirits this afternoon.

We have 2 very important appointments with officials this week. One is tomorrow morning (at 10:30) and the other is at 10 on Wednesday morning. Please keep us in your prayers – these appointments are critical. We know that God has gone before us to pave the way – or we wouldn’t have been granted these appointments.

TRAVELING

Our travels started off on an odd foot. “What is an odd foot” you ask? Great Question! That is the annoying foot you didn’t know you had, that you found out you had at a very inopportune time.

Anyway – we got to the SB airport early to meet with an acquaintance that is from Russia. We got there at 9am to talk about our plan to meet with the officials in Irkutsk. Somehow, we got our wires crossed, and our friend never made it to the airport. Our flight didn’t take off until 12:45 – so essentially, we were there 3 ½ hours early.

Our flight into Atlanta was slightly late. There is only 1 flight a day to Moscow, so we couldn’t miss it. Because of the delay, we only had 25 minutes to make it from one gate to the next. I don’t think we’ve ever walked so fast!

After a 9 ½ hour flight – we made it to Moscow. And, so did our luggage!

If you know me very well, you know that I have a few hot buttons. Things that always make me mad (or tick me off as my husband would say…I tend to get a little more than just mad). One of these things is having all my “stuff” with me (i.e. the stuff you can’t live without, your slippers – soap, stuff you pack that you would be really upset if it was lost); and the other thing is the baggage weight system with airlines.

It seems there is no consistency with this process. And that makes me mad. I don’t mind paying extra if my baggage is over weight – just tell me what the weight restriction is, or tell me what the fee is – BEFORE I GET TO THE AIRPORT!

I weight balance our luggage every time we fly. I know to the ounce how much everything weighs. I’ve even been known to write down what is in each bag, so when I repack to come home – I will know how much the bags weigh.

I figured out the system flying in the U.S. We only fly Delta, so it helps to know the system for one airline.

Well, then we started flying to Russia.

3 years ago, our bags were heavy. Probably nearly 60 lbs. We were charged $100 for overweight baggage. On the return flight, we were not charged.

2 years ago, I was charged $100 because apparently you are only allowed to check 1 bag between Moscow and Irkutsk.

Last year, we weren’t charged anything on the outbound, however when we were leaving, the lady in Irkutsk at the airport wouldn’t let us get our boarding pass until we paid $125. We didn’t have any cash left from the trip, and they wouldn’t take a credit card. That was a mess! We found an ATM, and figured it out…but I was ON THE EDGE!

This year – I very carefully read all of the rules about baggage on Aeroflot (the Russian airline). I talked with our travel agent to verify what I found on the website. The website clearly says (and yes, this is a quote from the website) “You can check-in 2 places on 23 kg each. Photo camera, portable PC, umbrella are items of carry-on and do not pass through check weigh.” When we checked in, they said we were only allowed 20kg.

We had 2 bags total, One weighed 43lbs (19.5kg), and the other 52lbs (23kg). The woman at the Aeroflot counter in Moscow would not allow us to boarding passes unless we paid a fee for our baggage. The fee was equal to $250! Yes, this is extortion at its finest! I was so mad; I had to walk away from the counter. I really thought I was going to lose it!

So, we got to Irkutsk, and were met at the airport by a friendly face. Our friend who picked us up from the airport was also picking up a lady from Paris who is adopting a child from Angrask (and I know I spelled that wrong). Her flight was also late, and she didn’t have time to claim her baggage in Moscow. Her luggage didn’t make it to Irkutsk – and she is going to court on Monday! Of course, I offered to loan her any clothing that she might need (even though I packed lightly – I have enough to pull together a court-appropriate outfit if necessary).

So – the moral of the story is this. Stop getting all worked up – things could be worse!

TIP TO SEE ALL PHOTOS

I just uploaded a bunch of photos from today. To see every post about this trip - which would include all of the photos on one screen - click the "Irkutsk Trip 2007" to the right...this will bring up all of the posts about this trip.

We're looking forward to hearing from you!

Of course, this is one of my favorite photos.

One big change in Anya on this trip is how snuggly she is. The last time we were here, she wasn't so into the hugging, snuggling, tickling etc. That isn't so this time! If she isn't on your lap, she's asking to sit on your lap. I picked her up, and then sat her down (because she was breaking my back because she is SO big!)...and the looked at me, put her hands in the air and gave me a big grin...ya, I picked her up again!

This is a picture that is on the walls by the main entrance of the dom. Anya is the artist! Can you believe that a 5 year old drew this?! I can't even draw this good! Not even if I had a stencil! So - not only is Anya the most beautiful girl in the world, and the smartest, but the most talented artist!

Keep in mind that in this photo, I have (at least) 2" heels on. She is so tall! I think she is going to be a model!

Oh My!

I don't know what they are feeding Anya, but she has gotten SO big!

When we got to the Detski Dom today, Anya saw us at the other end of the hallway, and came running up to us and jumped in our arms. I can not express in words how PERFECT she is. She is so tall!! Generally, during our first visit, she is a little timid - not this time! SHe was talking up a storm, hugging and kissing us. Telling us how she has been waiting to see us.

quick note

Hello Everyone,

It is 6am on Sunday here in Irkutsk. We're getting ready to go and see Anya this morning. We had a very interesting trip - we will post more later. Just wanted to let everyone know we made it here safe and sound.

-Kathy and Marty