LIFE LESSONS…

On the way home, Marty got a little frustrated with one of the inspectors at the airport. Your luggage has to go through at least 5 different screenings before you get a boarding pass. We were on one of the last screenings, and the woman was trying to tell us something in Russian we didn’t understand. We said (in Russia) we don’t understand do you speak English? Well, of course her reply was ‘Niet!” and continued on with badgering us to do whatever it was she was wanted us to do. This went on for several minutes, and then the woman grabbed Marty’s arm and drug him to the end of the conveyor belt at the end of the luggage screening machine to get him to take off the luggage that had passed through the x-ray. This was odd because there was more luggage to be put on the conveyor belt…anyway, Marty was very frustrated with this woman and his mouth got the best of him. I think he said something like ‘I don’t know what you are saying you stupid, fat, Russian wench”…or something like that.

I grabbed him and told him to PLEASE watch what he says, that there were reports of Americans being detained for no reason in Passport Control as they tried to leave Russia.

We finally got to the counter, got our boarding passes, and were pretty happy to be going home. We proceeded to passport control, and were stopped by 2 women who looked like they worked for the INS/TSA/Homeland Security equivalent in Russia. They wanted our passports. They asked for a voucher – we had no voucher. The next thing we knew, we were being escorted to some office at the far end of this hall. Another women was again asking us for a voucher – something we didn’t have and had never heard of. I asked to see what it looked like – and it looked like a college diploma with the heading ‘Voucher’ on it. The guard woman took my passport and was pointing to some words on the passport asking whom that was. The document in my passport was in Cyrillic (Russian) so I didn’t know what it said. I tried to tell her that I couldn’t read Russian, and she huffed and puffed…went back to her office and typed something in her computer. She came back and asked who we got our invitation from (in Russia, when you get a Visa, you also need an invitation from Russia to enter the country). I replied ‘Red Star’ – this is a travel agency in Washington that I think also has an office in Russia. The guard questioned me about Red Star (none of the questions I could answer) – she huffed and puffed again, went back to her office and reappeared asking why we were visiting Russia. Well, Marty piped up ‘We’re adopting a little girl in Irkutsk”. I almost threw my hand over his mouth! That is THE LAST thing you should sat to these people! We were traveling on a tourist visa, not an adoption visa. So, this woman said, “What business do you have in Irkutsk”…well, I’ve been reading online enough to know how to answer these questions. These are the typical questions that American’s were being asked…I told her we were there visiting the girl we hoped to adopt, we conducted no business while in Russia, we got our visa and invitation from Red Star in the United States, and we do not have the voucher she had been asking for. Apparently this is the answer she was looking for – she went back to her office, did something on her computer – handed us our passports and said good-bye. The end.

What is the moral of the story? Keep in control of your mouth when going through security immigration, and always let your wife do the talking!!!